I am back from my winter vacation, and I guess it's time to fill everyone in on what has been going on. As many of you know, I had lots of exciting girlbot adventures. I found someone that I began to deeply care for. She was smart, fun, and kind. She isn't interested in me, unfortunately. It burned me pretty bad, but I have recovered. There are many lessons I could take from this, good and bad.
I have elected to be a little more guarded in the future. I will never take women at their word again if I can avoid it. I consider both of these to be undesirable outcomes, but I also recognize them as valuable survival skills. I really think there has to be some level of compromise. I also realized that girls like her are out there. Maybe there is someone who will have the qualities I want and recognize a great thing when they see it. In any case, I have no harsh words for Jenny. I wish her the best of luck in her life, and I would be amiable toward the idea of our paths crossing again in the future. I don't place much hope in that, though. Hope and unabashed feeling have not served me well of late.
I return my focus squarely to my work, my health, and the pursuit of something better than this existence. I expect that there will be a lot of leisure travel during this stage of the quest. I need to go forth and experience the world anew. I have let this half-fulfilled version of myself limp on for long enough. Time for a teamkill to force a respawn. ;)
I leave you with a couple of thoughts on failure. They come from the book The Fighter's Mind.
"It comes back to dealing with adversity. Too much adversity, too much losing, and it becomes the 'same old same old.' It becomes a habit - it's not devastating. But if you only lose once in a while, at rare CRUCIAL times, you can build to a much higher level. You can use that as fuel." ~ Dan Gable
"'Investing in loss' means to study your defeat without ego, let defeats happen in practice without reverting to your old habits, and grow from it." ~Sam Sheridan
